What does a real man look like in the world? Think about the definition our culture gives to us. Look at the movies. Read the magazines. Listen to the music. What are the constants? I see three…muscles, money and women. A real man is tough. He doesn’t show emotions. He can handle his own business. A real man has money. Who cares if he blows it on trinkets? The point is he has it. A real man has women. You can’t be a real man and not have a girl.
But what if our culture is feeding us a lie? What if our culture is grossly misleading us when it comes to the nature of a real man? Our high schools, colleges, workplaces and homes are filled with men that are trying to be legitimate. The problem is we are looking for legitimacy from a culture that changes daily…hourly. A culture that is predicated on promiscuity. Infatuated with the almighty dollar. One day our culture tells us to dress one way. The next day it is completely different.
The picture of “real” our culture paints for men is just as ridiculous as the picture of the perfect body for women. It is a facade. Smoke and mirrors. We must wade through all the charades and cultural stigmas. It is a lot of wading. But once we dig below the surface, something different is exposed. Something divorced from the cultural nonsense. Something grounded in the Truth and not a perceived one. Something…real.
Here are 10 traits of a real man in today’s culture.
1. A real man always treats people with respect.
A real man doesn’t trash talk or bad mouth other people. “But Frank, what about my teacher at school? Or what about my boss at work? They deserve everything they are getting from me and others.” Right…so tell me again what you deserve for all the awful things you have done to others? See…a real man finds no value in tearing down other people. He realizes these people are not much different from himself. He also realizes God is not glorified in the tearing down of others.
2. A real man honors his wife and friends.
I grew up in an environment where wives were not honored. I was around too many people who used outings to the bar, the golf course or the hunting camp as opportunities to talk about their wives’ failures and downfalls. They would also throw in the failures of their friends for good measure. But show me a man who builds up his wife and friends…and I will show you a real man. Why? A man who honors his wife and friends can only do so because he is confident in himself.
Men, when was the last time you complimented your wife in front of others? When was the last time you made her feel important? A real man makes a habit of honoring and building up his wife and friends.
3. A real man never leads women on.
Guys, let me be real with you. If you date girls just to have a girl or you want sex…if you have no intentions on a legitimate relationship…you are a coward. That’s direct, yes. But it’s true. It’s real. If this is you, stop it. End the relationship. A real man respects the feelings and dignity of women. He does not see women as objects to fulfill his desires. He does not date because having a girl is fun or expected. There is intentionality behind his relationships.